Then there were three

Well you might have heard, either the through the grapevine or our haphazard phone tree, that mine and Adam's little Hamlet came early - about 2 1/2 weeks early to be exact. We had an ultrasound on November 15th that confirmed that our baby was frank breech. My midwife new how much I wanted Hamlet to flip so I could have a vaginal delivery. So after moxibustion, yoga, laying inverted three times a day for 15 minutes (with music and or light at the pelvic opening:), and, of course, bringing back our old friend ice - Hamlet decided to hold his ground. We had no other choice than to schedule an external version. We set the date for Saturday, November 20th, because the chief of OB would be in on that day, and she would really man handle me (both a good and a bad thing - I knew it was going to hurt....totally worth it to avoid surgery though).

Moxibustion = FAIL

Lying upside down = FAIL

Through some calculation derived all on his own, Adam determined that we had a less than 1% chance of needing an emergency C-section with this procedure. It was guided by ultrasound and if they perceived any danger they probably would just not even try to flip Hamlet. I did end up kicking it into gear after my last blog and got almost everything done I had planned for the last 2 weeks of my pregnancy, when work was supposed to slow down for me. Adam and I installed the car seat, packed our hospital bag, made my belly cast, did laundry, cleaned the house, assembled several baby items, got all the junk out of the babies room, and we squeezed in a little romantic date night too:) We did, however, miss opening night of HP7, which Adam will forever be sad about.

Saturday morning I woke up dreaming of the most amazing french toast ever. I do like the stuff but I usually don't crave it. I think knowing I was not supposed to eat breakfast made me have vivid food dreams. I had planned on waking up at 7:00 a.m. and doing my prenatal yoga to relax and ready my body for the flip. But when my alarm went off, I thought there is a less than 1% chance that this is my last morning to sleep in.....ever (according to all moms). So I snoozed. Then I woke up and got cute, since Adam told me we could go out to brunch after the version... a little french toast treat after my fast. And that man is so sweet, he didn't even eat breakfast either. I did take the term "fast" kind of loosely. I had a glass of milk, some green tea, and a lot of water, but no solids - except for a few pieces of Halloween candy. I wake up hungry, so I am glad I had something to look forward to, to keep me going.

We piddled a bit, listened to Jack Johnson, and packed the car. Then Adam clipped my toe nails after some reminding that we could have a baby today and I would never get that prenatal home pedicure he promised, so the least he could do was help a sister out with her velociraptor nails. Having any amount of white on my finger or toe nails drives me crazy. So not being able to cut my own toe nails for so long made me fixated on them. Once we took care of business we headed out to the hospital. The whole way we were daydreaming about how crazy it would be if the unlikely (less the 1 % chance) event did take place today. We snapped some "first false alarm" pictures when we got to the parking lot (little did we know:) and then headed up to the birthing pavilion. I got several compliments on how cute my baby bump was....and yes they may have just been cheap words from women who see pregnant bellies all the time...but I soaked it in.



We got taken back in to birthing suite 12 right around 10:00 a.m. This seemed promising since that is when my appointment was scheduled for. Brunch was right around the corner, I could almost taste it! The nurse had me change into a hospital gown and get hooked up to the fetal monitors to make sure Hamlet was doing well (and he was). I was already ravenous, but I just had to make it through 20 minutes of monitoring and 5 minutes of pushing, then I would be home free. We wondered about whether or not the version would work, or if we would be back in this same birthing suite when we had our baby. We wondered if all the rooms were blue or just ours and if that meant we were having a boy (Adam still thought boy, but I was becoming more convinced Hamlet was a girl). We wondered if Hamlet would flip on his own or if it would be snowing when I went into labor. After about two hours, we began to wonder if they forgot about us or if we would have time to get breakfast for dinner before we had to be at Young Life Club. I started to watch cooking shows, you know.... to get my mind off eating. And Adam went down to the car to get my computer to try and watch the Gators v. Appalachian State online. We also checked on HP7 IMAX tickets for Sunday online, but we decided to wait to order them, just in case.


Our nurse came in the room around 12:30 p.m. and said she had good and bad news. Oh no. She found out that one of the breakfast places that has the best french toast in town serves breakfast all day (she knew about my dream) = good. But the chief of OB and all the residents just left the floor to go do rounds in another part of the hospital = bad. Does an appointment mean nothing to you people?

So we entertained ourselves some more. Then our dear friend Liza came in. She was one of the OB residents sent in to do my ultrasound and check on the babies position. The position of the baby, cord, and placenta were all fine for the version but she looked concerned. Then she asked me how much amniotic fluid I had at my ultrasound on Monday. I told her I had about 12 cm (the lower end of the normal range). Her follow-up question was if my water had broke since Monday.....ummmm....no, not that I noticed. She then told Adam and I that there was only 2 cm of amniotic fluid surrounding Hamlet, which is almost nothing. Liza explained how the baby might not be lubricated enough for the version, but she would check. Next came the kicker. Liza said she would "check with the chief and if we can flip the baby, we will, and then induce, and if not we will prep you for a C-section, but either way your having this baby today."

Blank stare, disbelief, panic, a little crying. I think that was the sequence of things. Liza came back and told us the version was a no-go and I needed to be ready for a C-section in 20 minutes. She was very kind to me though, with how she broke the news. I felt like she really cared that this was not what I wanted. At that point, I knew this was what was best for our baby and I was really thankful that we had options to give Hamlet the healthiest birth possible. I got past the C-section and started to try and wrap my brain around the fact that I would be holding my baby in about one hour!



Adam and I started calling and texting as many people as we could. Michelle hopped in a car from Boston, the grandparents started looking for flights, and all of our wonderful friends started leaving us messages of love and well wishes. People were popping in and out of my room. I got stuck for an IV three times and then had some extra labs drawn because they were "concerned" about my bleeding times from all my botched IV sites (kinda scary when you are going in for major abdominal surgery - but I was fine). Then Adam donned his full body suit, with extra face covering for his man hair. And I was crowned with hair net and hospital socks. The team was ready to rush us out the door. In the midst of the frenzy, Adam and I asked for one more minute alone just to pray together and for him to hug me, so we could slow time down just a little bit. My head felt clear and everything started to feel super dream-like and surreal (very similar to being on the other side of the church doors and seeing my soon to be husband through the crack). I took deep slow breaths and as many mental snap shots as I could.

My processional led me past the nurses station and to the cold, very medical feeling OR, where I had to leave Adam at the door. The first thing I noticed was the ceiling - boring, white, and typical, but I thought this is what I will be looking at when I hear my babies cry for the first time. I warned the whole team I might get emotional and they assured me that was totally allowed. I then drummed up all my romantic mental imagery of me holding my baby (looking beautiful) and Adam hugging me and telling me what an amazingly strong woman I am. I was supposed to use these mental pictures to get me through labor, but I used them for my spinal tap. It worked. I got through it (all 10 or so tries). I am all about trying to be a tough cookie and letting the students/residents try without getting testy, because you gotta learn. I then went numb up to my nipples, which was strange and scary. My chest felt like a weight when I tried to laugh or take a deep breath and I kept squeezing Adam's hand to make sure I wasn't too weak up top. Adam assured me I was squeezing with adequate strength.

My sweet husband, who was supposed to open up his "love line" that we learned about in the Bradley method - where you talk sweetly and romantically to your partner, verbalizing everything you love about them- all the stuff that makes you fall in love and want to make babies with a person, could only say "Case, How you doing? You okay? How you feeling?" But I could see in his eyes how much he loved and cared for me:) And we were both pretty nervous. This wasn't an "emergency C-section" but we knew they worried about our baby and wanted to get him out as quick as possible. And Adam could probably tell I was about to blow chunks at any moment, not to mention, I think I was hyperventilating because breathing felt so weird. I was trying not to think about any of that and just get lost in my lover's eyes. I was also trying to block out the tugging and shaking of my body down below and the subtle smell of burnt flesh, that I knew was my own.

Then there was a lot of commotion and they told Adam to look over the sheet and I heard my babies first cry, right as Adam said "it's a boy." I can't even describe what I felt, but I was overcome with emotion. I was crying but I just felt such joy. Then Adam started to ask me if he could go be with our baby, but I cut him off and told him to go! I knew that they were pretty worried about my blood pressure, talking calmly but urgently, and giving me some bp meds under my tongue and I knew my baby boy looked like a blueberry. I was still conscious though, and he was crying, so I just laid there and listened to him and felt so thankful. After about 10 minutes of laying there listening to all the goings on and the play-by-play from the anesthesiologist who was still sitting by my head, he maneuvered the curtain slightly for me and I saw a little blue foot sticking straight up across the room. That was the first I saw of my son and I was so in love with that little blue foot! Finally, Adam brought him over to me and I kissed him and looked at his cute pouty lips. They let me hold him on the OR table, but I was really nervous because my arms were still very tingly and a little numb - so Adam spotted me. I felt much better after they slid my dead weight body back into my bed and laid my little naked baby right on my bare chest (where my tingly arms couldn't drop him). He had a full head of hair, and bruises on his tummy from kneeing himself while in his breech position, and the softest skin ever. I was madly in love.










We stayed like that for the next five or six hours. We had a welcome wagon of ladies in our room when we returned. My two closest friends from church, Megan and Penny, were there bearing gifts and a video camera. And my personal cheerleader in life, Michelle, had just arrived too. Perfect timing! They fussed over me and all told me my blue, swollen baby was cute - good friends:) Then my hospital dinner came and I ate all of it, while Michelle was out getting french toast from the restaurant Adam and I had been planning to go to all day. My nurse reminded me to take things slow, and I assured her I was. I started on the french toast as soon as Meech got back (I only dripped a little bit of syrup on my baby). By then the little Hamlet was ready to try breastfeeding. He was working to hard at breathing until then to give it a go. He latched on and went to town. Luckily, I got Adam's attention just in time for him to grab the baby, while Michelle handed me a basin, which I promptly vomited all of my dinner and french toast into (I guess I wasn't taking it slow enough). I think that was the easiest yuking experience of my life though - less than a minute of nausea, it came up quick, and I felt instantly back to normal- that never happens for me. So I ate some more french toast and tried to breast feed again. The same sequence of events occurred. Again the newborn, who we were still calling Hamlet, was not harmed by any vile stomach contents.



The third breastfeeding attempt was successful and all the nurses and lactation consultants who came in from then on couldn't get over what a breastfeeding champ my lil' man was. We proceeded to test out a bunch of different names out on our boy, but the name we had picked out from the beginning was the one that stuck, but Adam and I both had problems committing to something so permanent. Both of our moms confessed they were glad Boaz was not the one to stick. On his third day of life we made it official and named him William Grayson Hammond, but we call him Liam.



The last three weeks have felt like three or four long days. The lack of sleep gets less romantic as the days go on, but our boy has given us several good nights too. I think overall he is an easy baby. But even with an easy one, I am surprised at how inefficient I have become. Don't get me wrong. I am glad my main job right now is to cuddle with, stare at and care for my newborn - but I would think I could accomplish one thirty minute task a day that I set for myself, but no. I really feel like I can't get anything else done. I think my friend Lins was right when she told me if you don't finish something before the baby comes, you won't finish it. For instance this blog took me eight days to crank out! Oh well. I am doing my best to soak in my boys first month of life and trying not too think about him growing up yet (which keeps popping into my mind and makes me burst into tears). When Adam can tell I am on the brink of crying, he will start singing some song about a child growing up to fast like "Puff the magic dragon" or the "Circle Game." Then I loose it and cry so hard, that I start to laugh. At first I thought he was insanely cruel, but actually, I think he knows what he is doing. It's like an emotional release for me and after it's over I feel normal again.



Other than that, please forgive me if I haven't called you, returned your calls, or if I don't give you a Christmas present. I promise I have good intentions. I am just in the mom haze. I love you all and I can't wait for you to meet little Lili:)